


Ghost of You

by Drunk_Lich



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: I actually don't think pls don't trust me, I think (2), I'm Sorry, Idk why I even did this, It's not too angsty, Jun can see spirits, M/M, TRIGGER WARNING DEATH MENT, TRIGGER WARNING RAPE MENT, aka I killed off half of svt just for angst material, angst no fluff, i think, it's too bland why would there be fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-01
Updated: 2021-01-02
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:34:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28480998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Drunk_Lich/pseuds/Drunk_Lich
Summary: Where Jun can see spirits, and Wonwoo's soul never left the same spot for years now. He feels pity at both the man and at himself for falling inlove with him.
Relationships: Boo Seungkwan/Chwe Hansol | Vernon, Boo Seungkwan/Lee Chan | Dino, Hong Jisoo | Joshua/Yoon Jeonghan, Jeon Wonwoo & Wen Jun Hui | Jun, Jeon Wonwoo/Kim Mingyu, Kim Mingyu/Wen Jun Hui | Jun
Comments: 1
Kudos: 25





	1. Chapter 1

_ “Mom, who’s that next to the window?”, “There’s no one there, silly!” _

_ “Pa, why is there a child crying there? I think she’s lost!”,  _

_ “Junnie, I don’t see anyone there, are you sure you’re seeing correctly?” _

_ “Sir, have you found a small girl, she was last seen with a teddy bear and she had a yellow summer dress?”,  _

_ “Dad! Dad! that’s the kid I told you about earlier! Look!” _

Jun’s life as a child was nothing short of supernatural. He’s had the uncanny gift of seeing dead spirits that always wander around. Many of which were innocent and a bit lost, he even got to befriend a few of them.

His first friend was Stacey, the girl who went missing and was found dead near a pond. The details too gruesome but one can easily imagine what happened to the young girl in a secluded place.

Stacey didn’t grow up, unlike Jun, but she didn’t mind. She followed Jun around silently when they were young and kept to herself. It must’ve been a miracle that Jun got to make her talk, really. She said that Jun’s energy made her stick around, or something similar.

After that, he’s been hiding the fact to the outside world,  _ too dangerous and bothersome _ , said Cheol.

_ “Look, Jun. been there, done that. Nobody would care if you saw ghosts and even if they did, it’s all surface level. They’ll still treat you like shit.” _

And Cheol is probably right. He kept that to himself though, no need to inflate the ghost’s ego  _ that _ much.

As much as he hated to admit it though, he liked the company of the dead more than the living. Dead spirits tell the tales of the deceitful lives they lived, no more lies since their desire pale in comparison to the dread of leaving behind their flimsy identity on Earth.

_ “Hey, Cheol, what happens to you if, y’know, you get sent to your ‘assigned’ place?” _

_ “I don’t really know, but I heard that we lose our identity, then the people who knew us will forget us, until we’re erased from this world completely. Probably why people always wish to go down in history.” _

He’s made sure to live his life fully ever since then, making the most out of every situation, every occasion. He’d become a model at a young age, sponsoring big brands and becoming a young ambassador.

_ “Hey Jun, I know what you could become!” _

_ “What?” _

_ “You have the looks, and you definitely have the charisma. Why don’t you take up on modeling or acting?” _

“Jun-hyung!” Seungkwan’s voice snapped Jun out of his mini-trance. He panned his full attention back to the younger, “I’m sorry, I got distracted. What was that again?”

Seungkwan let it slide, easily returning to his narration. “As I was saying, there was this HOT guy in our work today, I think he’s an intern! But he’s probably still in college which sucks because even if I dated him we’d have 0 time to each other!”

“Aren’t you in College too?” He sipped on his lemon juice, “Well, true. But that’s exactly why we won’t work! I’m a model and he’s an intern, we’re both in college! It’s a disaster!”

Jun chuckled at the younger’s dilemma. Although Seungkwan liked to complain a lot, Jun was quite fond of him. He was the only other model Jun got along with, with the rest of the models in their agency being too spoiled or too arrogant. 

A breath of fresh air, he always comments..

“Well, I’m sure you’ll make something out of it, you’re Seungkwan, and what Seungkwan wants, Seungkwan gets. Right?” Jun teased lightly. The younger only nodding at him with clearer eyes.

“Yeah, you’re right.” He smiled brightly.

_ “God look at his smile~ Jun can you squish his cheeks for me?” _ Vernon nagged beside Jun. His semi-transparent face evidently painted red and pink over Seungkwan’s entire being.

Jun sadly smiled to himself before he complied, randomly pinching Boo’s cheeks and making the both of them laugh. Vernon was content with that though, as he continued watching Seungkwan animatedly talk about his day.

_ “Hey hyung, take care of my boyfriend for me, please?” _

Sometimes Jun wondered why, of all the people in the world, would he get the ability to commune with ghosts. He assumed it’s caused by major Yin energy converging when he was born, or maybe his mom carried a curse.

He didn’t blame them though. He’s learned how to take things as they go, and he even made friends with people he wouldn’t have met in this life.

“YOU TWO!” Jeonghan shouted, immediately catching the attention of the two, “WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT LEAVING YOUR SECRETARIES IN THE LOBBY WAITING?!”

The two people he was shouting at were models too, most likely the spoiled type based on what Jeonghan was scolding them about. They bowed to him in apology and ran to the elevator, afraid to infuriate the CEO even more.

Jeonghan let out an exasperated sigh, scanning the lobby with sharp eyes. Finally, his eyes landed on Jun’s and Seungkwan’s table, a smile blossoming to his lips.

He had a happy bounce to his step as he approached the two, “Hello my two favourite angels!~”

Behind him, a semi-transparent Joshua stood. Joshua shook his head at Jeonghan’s antics. “ _ He’s planning to send you two on another shoot.” _

Jeonghan smiled sweetly, opening his mouth to start his sweet-talking, “Why-” “Shoot?” Jun cut him quickly.

Jeonghan’s smile grew wider. He clapped his hands in delight, “You never fail to amaze me, Junhui. That’s right, I want you two to go on another shooting trip! Though it’s nothing extravagant this time, the old park will do just fine.”

Seungkwan lightly sloshed his americano, “How long?” 

Jeonghan’s sweet-talk smile slowly slid off, replaced with his negotiating face. Jun immediately knew this was going to be another war of words.

“10 hours. Sunrise shoot and Sunset shoot.” “Jeonghan-nim, too long. 4 hours.”

“Aish, Kwan-ah, we won’t get anything in 4 hours, okay 9.5”

“Hyung, we have other things to do! 3 hours!”

“Well, then I’ll be kind enough to only do the sunset shoot. 7 hours.”

“Hmm, 4”, “7”, “4”, “6”, “5” “5”

Jun laid back on his seat, content with even getting projects at this point. His career has been nothing short of fantastic for a young age, but it meant that he had to keep brand labels and endorsements secure, which meant he’s been getting lesser projects and lesser promotions.

“Deal?” “Deal.”

With that, Jun’s day seems to have sped up quickly. Seungkwan kept whining about this new project though, so Jun didn’t know what to expect.

A piece of good news came through later that day though, apparently, Mingyu will be their photographer. Boo’s complaints immediately took a 180° turn, suddenly anticipating the shoot and even checking his brands’ latest clothes just to see if he’ll find anything good.

**☆**

The cold winter air made Jun’s blood circulate on his face, trying hard to heat it and not get hypothermia. His comfortable clothes helped ward the cold, but the cotton could only contribute so much amidst this freezing weather.

His eyes traced the outline of his breath, the mist slowly dissipates in the gray hours of sunset and afternoon, the air taking his breath away to tell it the wonders of this world.

He watched it all, the careful swaying of leaves and grass around him, dyed orange from Autumn. He looked back at the bench in the middle of the park, where stood his- er, his ghost crush.

It made him feel stupid, but he never failed to watch or pass by him everyday. He never left the spot, purple sweater covering his frame and neck. His sharp features chiselled from the finest gems, yet soft as feathers and wrapped flowers.

Jun never knew his name, but he’s slowly fallen in love with his dedication. He knows that the guy is waiting for someone, but who it is Jun has no clue. It hurt him, really.

“Junnie-yah!” Mingyu’s call snapped back his attention. He looked back at the camera lens pointed at him, candid and unaware of the shutter and the flash of light.

“Perfect Candid look! I still don’t know how you do that!” His enthusiasm seems to know no bounds. Good, because Jun does not need the attent-

“By the way, what were you looking at?”

He spoke too early.

“I.. nothing really, my mind just sorta drifted.” Jun reasoned. It wasn’t exactly the truth but it’s truthful enough that Gyu didn’t bother anymore.

“Now, I kinda want you to make your flaps flip around, y’know? Maybe a running shot or a turning shot.” Jun never failed to notice the simplified terms Mingyu used everytime he wanted him to do a pose, and he can’t help but appreciate that.

He glanced at the descending sun, where he felt like his dreams and his hopes lay. Without knowing when, but his legs jogged- then he ran- then he chased after the horizon, a desperation to be the one to connect the sky and the lands.

Seungkwan’s cheers brought him to a halt, Gyu panting not too far from him, “Wonderful.. just, truly wonderful. You even finished before time, I can’t believe this!”

Gyu’s smile emphasized his happiness. Seungkwan agreeing visibly from afar.

Jun smiled again, maybe he’ll connect the two worlds again some other time.

He was ushered aside, left to wander in his thoughts while Seungkwan took his time posing. He sat beside the spirit of this park, a man too soft for his own good.

“ _ He’s… happy now _ .” He suddenly spoke up. If Jun’s spirit wanted to leave his body, it would’ve now because of the way it almost jumped out of his skin.

“Uh- wh- who?” Jun replied. It felt more like an obligation of conversation really, he wasn’t deeply interested in who the guy meant.

“ _ Mingyu. He’s happy now, I’m glad.”  _ He continued, a sad- almost broken smile crept itself on his features.

“ _ He wanted to confess to me before, on this exact spot. I remember him pointing the camera at me, waiting for my answer.” _ He brushed the purple sweater, covering his palms.

Jun hugged his legs close to his chest, “ _ But… he never got to say it. It’s my fault, and I hope he becomes happy with you now. _ ” The guy glanced at Jun.

He flashed a genuine smile at him, “ _ I can see why he’d like you, even I’d fall for you if I had the chance, really.” _

The guy leaned in closer, letting his incorporeal hands brush Jun’s cheeks closely, “ _ Will you remember my name? For both you and him?” _

Jun felt his throat slowly clog, the reality of the situation finally dawning on him, “Ye-Yes. I’ll remember your name. For you.”

The man seems to appreciate that, “ _ Jeon Wonwoo.” _

He leaned in and kissed Jun’s forehead, trying to pour all the warmth his non-existent body could even produce into the kiss.

Like his breath earlier, the wind also carried away Wonwoo’s body, tiny specks of his story being carried and told to the wind. It’s poetically sad, how you could meet your one and only yet leave them alone and lonely.

With Wonwoo disappearing, Mingyu came into view. His shy smile and nervous fluttering an obvious telltale of what’s going on in his mind.

“Jun- Junnie-yah,” He coughed lightly in his fist to spark his courage, “I- I wanted to talk to you. Privately.”

Jun nodded, letting the younger shoo Seungkwan away (not without promising to buy him another coffee drink)

Finally alone, both physically and spiritually, Mingyu seems to grow even tenser. “Uh- I- Jun- Well-”

Puzzle pieces that don’t seem to match blocked the words from his mouth. Gyu noticed, of course, so he let go of the thought, instead bringing the camera close to his eyes.

“Jun, if you woul- would want to be my boyfriend, can you pose for me?”

A strange way to ask someone out, really.

Bringing his fingers near his face, Jun offered a small peace sign as an answer. It seems to have offset Gyu though.

His hands slowly shook, not long later, Gyu’s hasty breaths grew louder. Jun rushed to him, “You- You posed just like him.”

Gyu removed the camera from his face, tears cascading slowly to his chin. 

“You posed just like Won.”


	2. THE PAST

**_Verkwan_ **

_ Trigger Warning: Sickness, Half-Dead, Death Mention _

Seungkwan hesitated at the very last minute, nervously glancing back up at Vernon, who had the softest smile.

“I- I don’t think I can do this, Noni, wha- what if–” Vernon’s frail hands shushed him, his sharp finger blocking the dam of nervousness that is Seungkwan, “I promise you, It will be fine. I’ll be fine, and most of all, you’ll be fine.”

Seungkwan sighed heavily, pouting hard in answer, “It’s just so- why are you so mature between the two of us?!” He sulkily slid to the available space next to the boy, seeking comfort in his heat and his frame.

Vernon’s laugh sounded so loud and reassuring when he heard it on his chest, “So that I can pamper you and love you better, silly.”

He couldn’t help but tear up at that, “Then I want to be mature too! So I can pamper you when you need to!”

Vernon visibly became displeased, even clicking his tongue in displeasure, “My Boo does not have the rights to grow, I want him to stay as someone I can spoil.”

He didn’t mean that, really. If anything, Vernon pushed Seungkwan to grow, to branch out and shine at every possibility. If it weren’t for him, Seungkwan knows he’d be lost as a lamb.

He traced small circles on Vernon’s chest, humming softly while he hid his blushing face, “Unfair, I want to take care of you too.”

Vernon laughed again, “You already are by being next to me,” He lightly brushed Seungkwan’s hair, “Watching you grow is already a form of taking care of me, okay? So never stop growing for both of us.”

Those words held the painful weight of reality. Seungkwan fought his tears from spilling, “... I will, Nonie, for us both.”

“For us both.” Vernon smiled, ignoring the dextrose hanging above him like a ticking timer, ready to count to his next suffering.

His pale face stared back at Seungkwan, despite his bony stature— from the lack of exercise and food— he still made Seungkwan feel so secure. 

He hated that Vernon made him feel comforted instead of him comforting him, who was so close to slipping away.

He held back his tears, instead forcing a smile to match Vernon’s, “Promise me… Promise me to grow with me, alright?”

Vernon nodded solemnly, “I’ll forever grow with you, my rin.”

He hugged Vernon once again, “Me too, my tle.”

Despite how slow-paced Vernon’s life was, how he always followed behind Seungkwan at a slow speed, like he wanted to admire every second of being alive. No matter how fast Seungkwan lived, nothing beat the speed of how Vernon left him, so abruptly and suddenly.

And he hated how Vernon gave him no reason to wallow and break down, always giving him bandages before he cracked, kissed his scars until they’re peachy. He hated how he felt happy and free he still felt despite Vernon disappearing from his life.

He can live alone, strong and independent, because of his tle, his turtle,  _ his Vernon _ .

He grew so tall and strong because of Vernon’s love.

**_Minwon_ **

Mingyu fidgeted with his camera again, uncomfortable with the weight constricting his neck. He looked back up at the man standing before him.

He felt breathless, his charm always captivated him. Mingyu knew that he’s been too shy for his own good- always flustered with every syllable, or afraid to take the dive, but he had enough.

Finally finding the courage (after 2 years), he spoke up now, “Wo- Wonu yah!”

Wonwoo broke into a smile, “you’ve said that four times already, Mingyu, what do you want to say?” 

Mingyu’s face flushed again, “I-”

“Chill,” Wonwoo cut him off, “I won’t bite.”

Mingyu chuckled at that, finding both humor and courage at the statement.

“I- I’m very passionate about photography,” he finally said. Wonwoo listened closely, not saying anything.

“And… and I’ve found the subject I want to take pictures of. For the rest of my- no. For the rest of our lives.”

Mingyu set his gaze on Wonwoo, “would- I mean, do you want to be my subject, Wonu-yah?”

Wonwoo smiled, bringing his sweater-covered hands up to his neck, “I wanted to for a long time now, Gyu, I’ve wanted to be your subject for a long time.”

He felt his breath catch, his heart racing in the confines of his chest. Without knowing it, Mingyu brought the camera close to his face and took a shot.

Wonwoo was fast enough to pull a pose though, a simple peace sign and a large smile.

**_Jihancheol_ **

_ Trigger Warning: Suicide _

“Shuaaaaaa~” Jeonghan whined into his paperworks, glancing needily at Joshua. 

He only shook at the other’s antics, “No Hannie, I’m not going to do your work for you, we can, however, pass this all to Cheol. What do you say?”

Jeonghan smiled wickedly at that, liking his bestfriend’s idea very much. “Let’s!”

Cheol, unaware and tired, didn’t realize that his stack of work kept growing everytime he finished a few. Jeonghan and Joshua were sneaky enough to make it subtle.

When Cheol noticed it though, the two were already out and about, buying ice cream cones like children.

Jeonghan sighed dreamily, “I miss the time when we were all kids, don’t you too Shuji?” 

Joshua hummed, licking his popsicle with child-like enthusiasm, “I miss pinching Cheol and dragging him through the mud.”

Jeonghan lightly punched his shoulders, “Hey! No need to be so harsh on the guy!”

They both laughed, finishing their ice cream and buying another— a reward for their lapdog Cheol.

However, their fun quickly disappeared when they reached Cheol’s apartment, ready to surprise him yet getting a bigger surprise in turn.

In the middle of the room stood- or rather, hung Cheol. His head hung lowly— a horrid contrast to the wilted sunflower in his living room.

The grief too great for the two of them, they even forgot to care for themselves, full of regrets as they wailed over Cheol’s funeral.

Too late, Jeonghan said, too late to notice that their friend died inside long ago.

Joshua’s disease soon came knocking too, easily knocking him out and leaving Jeonghan to fend for himself.

No friend to dump his work to, no one to whine to, no one would join him in his ice cream parties. Life cut off his two support pillars and made him stand on his own.

**_In the middle_ **

They all were a big part of their lives— Vernon to Boo, Wonwoo to Mingyu, Cheol and Shua to Jeonghan. Sometimes it gets hard for them to swallow reality. 

But maybe,  _ just maybe _ , Vernon still looks out to Seungkwan in tiny ways, maybe Wonwoo is still waiting for Mingyu’s confession, and maybe Joshua still eats ice cream with Jeonghan, or maybe Cheol still does his paperwork when Jeonghan’s too tired.

**Author's Note:**

> I hate this it's so bland but I'm gonna add special chaps for both the dead couples and alive couples, pls lmk if u'll read those ahsadfhagfa


End file.
